Lost then Found Page 3

  Because, right now, Aidan wasn’t reacting at all. His face didn’t change. He didn’t move a single muscle, not a single twitch.

  “Was?” he asked in that infuriatingly calm tone. I hated him for that, even more than I hated him for leaving. Why wasn’t he reacting? Why didn’t he seem to care?

  “I gave birth to a son. Jack. I called him Jack. He’s…he’s yours.”

  Aidan looked away, breaking eye contact.

  Finally, finally, something I said seemed to get through to him. He pushed his chair back and walked over to the railing of the balcony.

  “I have a son,” he said slowly, looking out over the busy street below.

  It wasn’t really a question. I nodded anyway.

  “Yes,” I said out loud when I realized he wouldn’t see my answer.

  There had been a time when I’d been angry that he’d made me a single mom. The sleepless nights looking after a crying baby by myself, the nights spent in tears because the man I loved had disappeared, the times I’d cried because my new son looked so much like his absent father.

  But, everything between me and Aidan was so long ago now. My life had changed. I’d moved on. Jack was my life now. It was the two of us against the world — and I loved that.

  Watching Aidan now, I felt sympathy for him. He looked so lost, blankly staring down from that balcony. Stripped of his usual arrogance, he looked like a grown-up version of Jack, and I saw a lost little boy who needed me to comfort him.

  Then he frowned and the illusion was shattered.

  My anger returned, a hot ball of fury that sat on my chest, squeezing the air from my lungs. Yes, I was angry, but it was fear that kept my anger boiling hot.

  I was scared of how he was going to take this news.

  “Why didn’t you tell me before? Clearly you’re not trying to hide him from me. What changed?”

  “I never had a chance to tell you before.”

  He pulled a face, clearly hating my answer, his handsome features pulling the same expression that Jack pulled when I tried to feed him steamed broccoli.

  “You’re saying you had no way of contacting me? That you couldn’t have emailed me whenever you wanted.”

  “Email!? You’re the one that wouldn’t even answer your phone! You made it clear that you didn’t want to hear from me.”

  “That’s not…” he said angrily, before breaking off with an annoyed sound.

  I wasn’t ashamed that I hadn’t told him before. I wasn’t going to let him blame me for this.

  “Show me a picture of him,” he commanded, his eyes crinkling sadly.

  6

  Aidan

  I had rehearsed what I would say to Erica for weeks. I intended to explain everything, calmly and rationally. It wasn’t going to be like last time. I was going to give her all the information, and if she still wanted to be with me, then…then I could finally stop missing her. I could finally be free of the dull ache that had been my constant companion since I left her.

  Before I could tell her any of my plans, she dropped a bomb on me.

  I had a son!

  I stared down from the restaurant balcony, looking down at the people below as they went about their lives with no idea of the turmoil I was in.

  All those times that I had prided myself on being an honorable man, on putting family ahead of everything else. Yet, I had a son, out there in the world. I’d never met him. He would have no idea who I was.

  She could have contacted me at any time. She had kept my son from me. It was easy to slide into anger.

  But, the situation was complicated. By keeping my son secret, she had unwittingly protected him from danger.

  “Show me a picture of him,” I said.

  I knew that Erica was an honest person, but the cold, logical part of me doubted her. It would be very easy for her to lie, and try to pass off another man’s child as my son.

  She took her phone from her handbag and, clicking it on, passed it across the table to me. There, set as her wallpaper, smiling up at me, was a picture of a little boy. He was sitting on a swing, there was a look of simple joy on his face. It was infectious — just looking at him made my lips twitch into a small smile.

  It was like looking at a picture of myself, from my childhood. This really was my son. The reality of it slammed into me, staring me in the face. I cradled Erica’s phone in my hand, memorizing every feature.

  I knew, on a deep and instinctual level, that Erica had been telling the truth. But looking at the smiling face of my only child, a boy I’d never spoken to, was overwhelming. It was too much to process, I slumped in my chair, still staring at the photo, suddenly aware of the vast emptiness inside me. I was hollowed out as I accepted that I really was a father.

  The phone, untouched for too long, turned black. The screen became a poor mirror, reflecting my face up at me.

  ‘Jack’ she had named him.

  Why had she picked that name? Was it meaningful to her? Some male relative perhaps?

  I hadn’t got the chance to name him. It stung, that missed opportunity.

  How many more missed opportunities had there been?

  His first words? His first steps? I’d missed all of those things. My mouth fell into a flat line, echoing the sudden flat emptiness in my heart. I’d never get those things back.

  I didn’t really know much about kids. In fact, I didn’t know anything. I couldn’t say how old he was in the picture, although I knew he had to be around four and a half years old.

  I handed the phone across the table, back to her. Our fingertips brushed. The small touch making me freeze. This was the first time I’d touched her in years and I could feel my body reacting to her. It didn’t matter that it was just an innocent, harmless touch, it was enough to send sparks crackling down my spine.

  “I want to meet him.”

  “Sure, of course.”

  “What does he know about me? What have you told him about his father?”

  “He’s not…He hasn’t really asked about you yet. A lot of his friend’s parents are divorced, so when I told him his Dad wasn’t around, he just sort of accepted it.”

  I frowned uneasily. I didn’t like the sound of that.

  I like being in control of a situation. I prided myself on my research and preparation. My ability to study all the angles of a problem, and be ready for any eventuality. To corner my opponent and eventually, get the outcome I was looking for. But, for the first time, I was the one at a loss. I didn’t know the first thing about being a Dad. I was going to have to learn.

  “You have him in daycare?”

  “Yeah, it’s a great little place. He’s really happy there.”

  And for the first time in the conversation, I noticed the strain in Erica’s voice. She was nervous about how I was going to react. She was probably right to be nervous, but her revelation about Jack would make this next conversation go a lot more smoothly. Perhaps that was callous of me, but she’d kept my son from me for years - I was low on sympathy.

  “Good. I’ll come over tonight and you’ll introduce me.”

  “Tonight?”

  “I want to be involved in my son’s life, Erica. That’s fair enough, isn’t it?”

  “I’m not trying to keep you from him…I just can’t let you…I won’t let you…he’s a sweet boy, he’ll love you, and he’ll want you in this life. He’ll come to rely on you….And then you’ll disappear again. I won’t let you break his heart.”

  I was about to angrily deny that I would ever hurt my son, but just then the waiter appeared at my elbow, asking if we were ready to order. I bit back my anger and, glancing at the menu, ordered us both medium-rare filet mignon.

  I took a few deep breaths to calm down, as I impatiently waited for the boy to leave.

  “I have no intention of abandoning him! It’s not your right to make decisions based on what you assume I might do.

  “It is my right to protect Jack from harm!”

  “You’re calling knowi
ng his father, harm?? You think I would ever harm him!”

  “Yes!” she said heatedly, shoving her napkin down onto the table. Finally, her demure exterior was cracking! There was that spark of heat that had always drawn me to her! Her eyes flashed, angry and beautiful. Her chin jutted out, as she held her own against me.

  I remembered the way that she used to do that. It always made me want to press a bruising kiss against her fuming lips.

  This was the passion that I had been looking for, that I hoped she still had for me. Before this meeting, I’d been worried that she’d forgotten me - but now it turned out that she hadn’t! Every day since I’d left, she’d lived with a permanent reminder of our time together.

  I liked that. I liked that she’d had to think of me.

  Just like I had spent so much time thinking about her.

  And with that, it was time to reveal why I’d returned to New York. I held up my hand to stop her from saying anything else. I wanted my son in my life, and what I was doing next was for his benefit as much as mine.

  “We’re going to have to continue this argument later. There’s something else that we need to discuss. I asked you here because I wanted to talk to you about the future of the IBA. Normally I wouldn’t bring this up at a time like this, but I’m afraid I’m out of time.”

  She frowned, a confused look on her face.

  “You know that my father is the President, and that his heir will take over the company when he dies. At the moment, however, I am unable to inherit. That hasn’t really been an issue, as Dad is usually in great health. But, a few months ago, he had a small heart attack.”

  “Oh,” she gasped, “I’m sorry, Aidan. That’s terrible. Are you OK?”

  I nodded distractedly. In my usual social circles, people would ask why I wasn’t going to inherit instead of being sympathetic about losing my father.

  “He’s recovering, and stepping back from work. He’s stubborn, it’s difficult to persuade him to take things easy. There is something I can do that will put his mind at rest. His life’s work has been running IBA and I need him to know that the company will be in safe hands, no matter what happens to him.”

  “You’ll take over, if anything happened to him,” she said, like it was the simplest thing in the world. I shook my head.

  “Unfortunately, it’s not that simple. There’s a clause, written into the company charter by the Founder of the company. In order to inherit the company the heir has to be married. I’m not married, so I can’t inherit. It’s a sixteenth century rule. Written in a time when this kind of thing was still important, but it’s still on the books and, amazingly, it’s still legally binding.”

  “Surely, there must be a way out of it? If you don’t want to get married.”

  “My father tried to get it removed as soon as I brought it to his attention. It’s an arcane law, it shouldn’t’ still be on the books of any modern company. Unfortunately, companies of our size can move slowly. He was trying to sort out the whole legal mess of it when he had his heart attack. I don’t want him to have to worry about it anymore. He doesn’t need any stress in his life - he should be concentrating on getting strong again.”

  “I don’t understand. Are you saying you’re going to get rid of this married heir clause?”

  “I will. It’s going to be the first thing I do once I’m President. But, for right now, that would take too long. I just want to set Dad’s mind to rest that I’m able to look after the company for him.”

  “So…You’re going to get married?” she asked incredulously, her pretty eyes widening in surprise.

  “That’s right.”

  She looked down, pushing her chair back slightly as if she was about to just walk out of the restaurant.

  “Do you have anyone in mind?” she asked quietly.

  “Uh-huh,” I nodded. Just then the damned waiter came back out to the balcony, carrying two plates of food. We sat in silence as he laid the plates in front of us. I’d ordered but I wasn’t hungry. She stared at her food, not making any move to start eating. It seemed like she wasn’t hungry either.

  “Do I know her?” she asked, her voice even quieter so that I had to strain to hear her above the sound of the breeze.

  “It’s you,” I said. Surely I’d been clear about that? It must be obvious! Why else did she think I’d asked her to come to lunch with me?

  “Me?” she yelped. Yes, she was definitely surprised.

  “It won’t be for long,” I said, pushing my plate away from me. “My first act as new President is going to be to remove this clause, so we’ll be able to divorce, or have it annulled, whatever. I’m willing to offer you a very generous settlement for the inconvenience.”

  “You want me to marry you? You’re proposing to me??” she said, her mouth gaping in astonishment.

  “This is a business arrangement,” I lied. I could have chosen any woman to be my wife until I became President. I had an ulterior motive to this offer. When I realized that I was going to need a fake wife to inherit IBA, there was really only one choice. The only woman that I wanted to marry was Erica.

  I’d spent years missing her, and finally this was my chance to spend some time with her again.

  “I’m willing to pay you one million dollars.”

  “A million?!”

  I nodded, continuing, “A million, if you’ll be my wife. We’ll need to put on a bit of a show to convince people that it’s a legal marriage. Obviously, I can’t tell you how long we’ll need to keep up the charade. I won’t be able to change anything until I’m President, and I don’t really want to speculate how long that will be.”

  I didn’t want to think about how much longer Dad had left.

  “Aidan…This is…this is a shock. I wasn’t expecting to ever see you again, let alone this..”

  Her luminous eyes were troubled. Was she still so angry at the way that I’d left her that she would refuse a million dollars?

  “It’ll be a chance for me to get to know my son.”

  Her lips twisted, like that was a negative thing.

  “Yes…but…then he won’t understand that this won’t be a real marriage. I don’t want him to get to know his dad and then suffer when you disappear. I’m not putting him through that. There isn’t enough money in the world that would make it worth it. He won’t understand that. He’s a loving boy and you’ll hurt him.”

  “I’ll still be his father, even after we end our arrangement,” I said, annoyed now. Of course I wasn’t going to disappear from my son’s life! I didn’t know why she would think such a thing! “Think of the life that you can give him with a million dollars.”

  She still looked unconvinced and I knew I had to sweeten the deal.

  “I’ll pay for his college tuition, whatever university he gets into, whatever subject he studies, it’ll be taken care of. You’ll get the million on the day we’re divorced.”

  Of course, no son of mine would have to worry about the little details of things like college tuition. But it looked like Erica hadn’t worked that out yet. She was starting to look more convinced as she licked her lips slowly.

  “Why me? Why do you want me for this?”

  All she needed to know was that I needed someone. I wasn’t about to tell her my reasons.

  “I know that I can trust you to keep a secret. You kept quiet five years ago, after our tryst. That’s not something most people could, or would, do. I assumed you would be capable of keeping the details of this marriage to yourself.”

  She nodded wearily, not agreeing to anything yet, but just showing that she understood my reasoning. Her hair was tied up in a professional style but now the breeze worked loose a strand of hair. It flapped across her face, sticking to the wetness of her lips. She tucked the strand behind her ear and looked up at me, her eyes blazing with a determined light.

  “Alright…what do I have to do?”

  7

  Erica

  The usual crowd of moms was at the daycare. Whenever
I have time, I like to hang around and chat, everyone swapping stories about their kids - the cute things they’d done, the new word they’d learned. It’s a good way to make sure that Jack is keeping up with the other kids, and it’s also the only place I can really boast about him to people who understand.

  Today though, I just wanted to pick up Jack and go home. I edged past the group that had gathered in the hallway.

  “Hi, Erica,” Jill said brightly, she was the mom of one of Jack’s friends and she’d been at Jack’s last birthday party. “I was just talking about pre-school. What was the name of that place that you were talking about last week? Rosebeech? Rosepalm?”

  “Rosewood Preschool,” I said. I didn’t want to be rude, but I wasn’t in the mood for the usual chatter just now. There was far too much on my mind.

  “Rosewood! I knew it was something like that!” Jill said, snapping her fingers.

  “Ooh, I was looking at Rosewood too!” exclaimed another mom. “It’s quite expensive though, isn’t it?”

  “Well, goodness, they’re all expensive!” Jill laughed, and I felt a thrill of dislike for her just then. Guiltily, I shoved the thought aside. Jill was a nice person.“But, what else can you do? You want to be a good mother, don’t you?”

  “Excuse me,” I muttered, walking away as the conversation continued without me. Of course I wanted to be a good mother. And that meant sending Jack to Rosewood, and a thousand other expenses over the next decade.

  It all added up.

  Sure, I was getting by OK now. IBA paid well enough. If it was just me living off my salary then it would be a different story. Being a mom in the city is expensive…but with a million dollars! I could give Jack the most wonderful childhood ever!

  I could give up my job and be with Jack all the time. We could get out of the city and I could raise him somewhere safer. Somewhere we could buy a little patch of land, we could have a yard! Jack would be able to play outside! He would love that, and the fresh air would be so good for his health.

  All I had have to do was be “married” to Aidan for a short while. Not the worst trade in the world.