Lost then Found Page 11

  As I walked down the hallway, I heard a gentle, melodic whispering. I stopped, straining my ears to hear what was making that sound. I recognized it as Erica’s voice, but I’d never heard her make sounds like that before.

  Placing my feet carefully, so that I wouldn’t make a sound as I moved, I went down the hallway. Jack’s bedroom door was ajar and as I got closer I could hear that Erica was singing Jack a lullaby. Her voice was so quiet that it wasn’t really a song, more like a whisper with a hint of a tune. There was a night light in his bedroom and it’s dim light came out into the hallway.

  I opened the door slowly, watching as the mother of my child sang our son to sleep, sitting on his bed and stroking his hair. Seeing that made me freeze, rooted to the spot. The family that I had dreamed of as a kid, the one thing that I’d given up all hope for because I thought I’d never achieve it - that family already existed and they were right here in front of me.

  Jack made a cute little sound, low and nasal. It made me smile as I realized that it was a snore. I’d never heard a child snore before. I guess, I’d never really thought about it before, but I hadn’t known that kids snored at all.

  I wanted to keep quiet and not disturb them, but the sounds Jack was making were just too funny. I laughed under my breath, but I must have made too much noise, because Erica abruptly broke off her lullaby and glared up at me.

  She looked so angry although I didn’t understand why. If either of us had the right to be angry then it was me. She was the one who had hidden Jack from me, making me miss out on his childhood. I had missed out on so much. I hadn’t been there for his first step, or his first word.

  But, in my heart, I knew that it had been for the best. If I had been part of Jack’s life then he would have been in danger.

  Erica’s face smoothed over, her anger fading as she lifted a finger to her mouth, warning me to be quiet. I nodded in understanding. She didn’t want me waking Jack up. Turned out my fierce little firecracker was quite the Momma Bear!

  “Shh,” Erica whispered, “He had a bad dream. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

  “You didn’t. I was looking for you.”

  “Why?”

  I snorted, too loudly, and Jack stirred. Erica glared at me, making another shushing noise.

  “Fine, I’ll just make sure Jack is asleep.”

  I nodded and then padded back to my bedroom, lying back down on my bed, my thoughts still focused on what I’d just seen. I would never have guessed it when I first met Erica, but motherhood really suited her. She made it look so easy - and so sexy.

  I wish I’d seen her pregnant, her belly round with my child!

  There was no question in my mind. I’d pay anything, right now, to be able to see that! To be able to feel that! To put my hands on her pregnant stomach and feel my baby moving and kicking.

  I was staring up at the ceiling, lost in my imagination, thinking about what pregnant Erica would have looked liked, what it would have been like if I could have been with her.

  Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, something moved. I sat up in bed, wide awake, as my bedroom door was pushed open. I’d lived alone for so long, even though I was expecting Erica - it was still strange to have other people in my penthouse, let alone coming in to my bedroom without even knocking!

  Erica’s head appeared, peering round the door. Seeing that I was wide awake, she stepped into the room, looking uncomfortable, like she was already regretting coming in here. I patted the bed beside me, encouraging her to come to me.

  She sighed and I wondered what she was doing here. Did she feel the same physical draw that I felt between us? Or was there simply something she wanted to discuss with me, without Jack around.

  Settling down on the bed next to me, it looked like she was just going to sit there. I put my arm around her, half lying back down, so that my back was resting against the headboard. She followed me, her body pliant as I moved us until we were sprawled side by side in the darkness.

  There was a fragile sense of intimacy to being like this but I couldn’t stop thinking about what Jack and Erica’s life had been like before I knew about Jack. About pregnant Erica and what Jack had looked like when he was first born and every other little detail that I had missed. I wanted to know all of it.

  “What was Jack’s first word?”

  I could barely make out her face, I definitely couldn’t see her expression. But I could feel the way her body became tense. The muscles of her shoulder flexed under my hand and I started massaging it with my fingers, trying to get her to relax.

  “Mama…his first word was Mama.”

  I nodded, it made sense. Even though I knew very little about babies, I could imagine that Mama, or Dada, was a common first word. My fingers continued to massage her, the tension in her muscles slowly fading as I worked.

  Touching her like this reminded me of how small she was - it felt like my splayed hand was almost as wide as her back.

  “I should go,” she said, not moving away.

  “Don’t!” I said, the word coming out of my throat as a sharp command. She was wearing a loose nightgown, the straps of which had fallen out of place as I rubbed her back. In the dark like this, it felt we could do anything - like it was just the two of us, alone in the world. “I want you here.”

  She laughed, “We don’t always get what we want.”

  I snorted.

  “I do,” I retorted spontaneously, the words slipping out without thought. But, as soon as I said them, I knew they were a lie. I didn’t always get what I wanted.

  I didn’t get Erica. I didn’t get the years of our life together that I’d missed out on. I didn’t get more than this short time with her.

  She rolled over, her hands reaching out to touch me - was this the first time she’d reached out for me? It felt like it. In the darkness, I didn’t have to hide my proud smile as I welcomed her coy touches. Timidly touching the muscles of my chest, her fingernails scratching out the outline of my pecs, her movements slow, almost reverent as she moved lower. God, it was making me hard, having her touch me like this.

  Her nails marked out each of my abs and lats, working lower and ever lower, until she got to the edge of me boxers. Her fingers dipped just under the material, hesitating and unsure, not going any further.

  “It’s OK, you’re allowed,” I drawled, and that was all the encouragement she needed. Her fingers pulled suddenly at my boxers, shoving them down violently as her hot mouth latched onto my chest, her lips following the same trail around my muscles that her fingers had just completed. Her head bobbed down, as my cock strained up, eager for her to get closer.

  Her wet lips kissed a path along my Adonis belt, getting close enough to my cock that I could feel her hot breath. Fuck, I wanted that wet heat on me right now!

  She planted a closed mouth kiss, right on the tip of my aching and throbbing cock. It was a tease, building me up with no relief in sight. I my fingers ran through her hair, grabbing two thick fistfuls.

  “Open your mouth for me,” I said, trying to sound commanding, but she was undoing me with her little kitten kisses. My commanding tone came out sounding more like a rasp, low and hoarse.

  But she listened to me. Suddenly she swallowed me down, encasing my cock in one mind blowing second, sucking me back in one deep, hard inhalation. Her tongue laved at me with long, decadent licks as she slowly raised her head and then sank back down, swallowing me down again.

  God, I wished, I’d turned the light on, I wished I could see her lips wrapping around my cock. I felt her moaning, the most wonderful kind of lewd, muted by my cock filling her mouth. I could feel her eagerness and her greed for more, that was the sort of attitude that deserved praise:

  “That’s my good girl. As wide as you can go, sweetheart. Good.”

  I lifted my hips, gently fucking her throat in long lazy thrusts, my hands tangling in her hair and hold her head in place. God, she felt so good, but I didn’t want to cum down her throat. I wanted to take he
r again, I wanted to her to cum on my cock.

  I pulled her head away, giving her time to take a few rasping breaths. Quickly, she darted up, catching me by surprise as she pressed her mouth to my lips. She kissed like she was drowning, desperate and frenzied, like my mouth was the key to her survival.

  “Fuck me, Aidan!” she asked, sending me reeling.

  I could feel her wet pussy, just above my cock, ready for me. I grabbed her hips, holding her in place above me: teasing her, not letting her sit down, dipping the very tip of my cock into her. She moaned, frustrated, trying to sit on my dick. But my strong hands were holding her up, stopping her from getting what she wanted, what she needed.

  “Do you want me to beg?” she asked, her voice reedy and almost unrecognizable.

  “Yes, yes, I do. Beg for me sweetheart.”

  “Jesus, Aidan,” she whined, pressing down uselessly, “Please, please, I need you.”

  God, she was so fucking perfect. How could I resist?

  I pulled her hips down, impaling my cock into her in one full long stroke, straight into the hot clutch of her welcoming pussy.

  “Aidan!” she screamed, throwing her head back.

  My hands felt large on her hips, forcefully lifting her body to take my thrusts. All she could do was stay still, straddled above me, as I controlled her body, grinding up into her over and over again.

  I could feel the burning heat inside of her, as she took me so beautifully. Each time I thrust up, she squirmed her hips - trying to take more of me, to take me deeper. Jesus, I could feel my orgasm building, my balls tightening as I got closer and closer. I needed her to cum, I needed to feel the sweet pressure of her orgasm.

  I pounded hard, my thrusts turning brutal - turning her sharp little gasps into screams of pleasure. Above me, she was writhing frantically, needy and perfect, and just as I thought I wouldn’t be able to hold on any longer, I felt her spasm, her whole body going rigid. There was no more holding back for me. My cock was ready to burst, trapped in her heat. I pulled her down, pushing deep inside and cumming with a roar, part yell and part grunt, as I pumped my seed into her.

  I released my hold on her hips and she dropped onto my chest like a puppet whose strings had just been cut, boneless and unmoving as she basked in her orgasm. I held onto her butt cheeks, feeling those lovely curves in the palms of my hands as I pressed her down, releasing another spurt of cum deep inside her.

  She made a broken, tired sound, rubbing her face against my chest, as I heard her faintly mutter my name. I didn’t more, willing her to stay where she was, exactly where she was, her tits pressed into me and her arms flung around me in a way that was almost an embrace.

  Finally, my soft cock fell out of her and she rolled off me, although her breathing hadn’t returned to normal. In the darkness, her panting breath sounded loud. I slung an arm around her, pulling her to me. I wanted her to stay. It was one thing to make her beg during sec, but my little firecracker wasn’t going to just do what I told her in any other situation. Instead, I tried starting a conversation.

  “Tomorrow,” I told her, “We’ll go to Connecticut.”

  “Connecticut? That’s where your dad lives?”

  I nodded, pulling her closer to me so that she was tucked under my arm. Her face lay on my chest and I could feel her heartbeat as it gradually slowed down. My smart little girl had already figured out what I wanted to show her in Connecticut.

  “Yeah,” I said, holding on to as I felt her stir and try to sit up.

  “I should get back to my own bed.”

  “Stay.”

  I could feel her body relaxing. I knew that she wanted to obey me, but I already knew she was going to leave.

  “What if Jack has another nightmare? He won’t know where I am. I should get back to my own room.”

  I sighed, holding her close, feeling the softness of her curves against me. What she said was true. I hated the thought of Jack waking up, scared and not able to find his Mommy. I let her go, watching her silhouette was she stood up, pulling her nightgown back into place. She left without another word.

  I stared back up at the ceiling, trying to enjoy the fading traces of my orgasm. At least tomorrow was going to be a better day. I’d already told Dad all about Erica and Jack, but meeting them in person? Well that’s a whole different ball game.

  15

  Erica

  “This is where you grew up?” I asked in astonishment, as the car slowly drove up the long gravel driveway I could feel a nauseousness grow in the pit of my stomach. All around us was a long lawn, edged by woodland. I peered up ahead to see where we were going, but the driveway curved and the trees blocked my view.

  How big was this place? It felt like we’d come through the front gate five minutes ago, but we still weren’t at the house. In his car seat in the back, Jack was making little noises to himself, humming and singing to keep himself entertained.

  “For the most part. My father’s job meant we traveled a lot, but I spent a good part of my childhood here,” Aidan reached over and put a hand on my knee. I put my hand on top of his, letting our fingers intertwine. I needed the moral support. We were going to meet Aidan’s father and I was terrified.

  Sure, Aidan was my boss, and the CEO of the company. But his father was the President of an international investment bank! He was practically Askovian royalty! What was he going to make of me?

  Even if he didn’t hate me, he was definitely going to think that I wasn’t good enough for his son. He was probably going to think that I was some sort of gold-digger!

  “I want Jack to spend time here too. It did me the world of good, having the space to run around as a boy. God, I think I climbed, and fell out of, every tree on the estate.”

  I laughed nervously, and Aidan glanced over at me. His fingers pressed against mine. I didn’t know if he was trying to reassure me, but it felt like it. I’d take it.

  “There are a few other people living here too. Smith, who looks after everything, and then Nora who is Dad’s main nurse. There are a few others who come in to help out, but Nora is with him all the time. They’re all very excited to meet you and Jack.”

  Just then, the car turned a bend and the house came into view.

  I let out a gasp. I could have been looking at the cover of some lifestyle magazine, the kind of massive place that I might have ogled in the past, idly daydreaming about what it might be like to live there.

  But only as a daydream. I never imagined that people, real people, actually lived in this kind of opulence. Oh, God, all my nerves ramped back up. For all the times that I’d seen Aidan throw his money around, this house was a whole other level of intimidating wealth. I was practically sick with nerves, how was I going to talk to Mr Stryker?

  My knee jiggled up and down, an old nervous tick that I thought I’d grown out of years ago. Aidan’s hand let go of my fingers to hold onto my knee, keeping me still. We pulled up to the house and he gave my knee a last, little squeeze before he turned the engine off. I sighed, steadying my nerves in the safety of the car. I felt like I was going into battle.

  I opened the car door but then, l before I could get out of the car, Aidan leaned over to grab my wrist.

  “Do me a favor, while we’re here.”

  His eyes stared into mine like he was trying to impel me by the sheer force of his will. God help me, but seeing him look at me like that, well, it always did something to me. All those nerves in my stomach suddenly changed into something much more pleasant. In the same way as, yesterday, I’d been nervous that we’d be caught in the fitting room - but those nerves also felt kinda good.

  “Depends,” I grinned, feeling flirtatious. I liked the idea of him needing a favor from me.

  “Dad doesn’t know anything about this marriage. He thinks…He thinks this is real between us. He’s an old man and he’s sick, I don’t want him to worry.”

  “Aidan…” I sighed. Of course I was willing to spare the feelings of an old, sickly man. I was just s
o tired of having to pretend that I’d forgiven Aidan. It was just too easy to enjoy our life together…and then I’d remember how much he’d hurt me and I got sad again, a deep weariness settling into my bones that stopped me from ever quite relaxing. “I’m not going to tell him anything.”

  He let me go with an approving nod. That look sent an automatic flush of warmth through me. I wished it didn’t. I wished I didn’t care what Aidan thought of me! It would make my life so much easier if I could stop caring.

  “Alright, Jack,” he turned to peer into the back seat. “Are you ready to meet your grandpa?”

  We got out of the car and walked up to the large set of double doors at the front of the house. The doors were large, wooden and, as I got closer I saw, they had small designs carved into them. There was an old-fashioned wrought iron chain to pull in order to ring the front door bell - I guessed it wasn’t used anymore, because the gatekeeper had already buzzed us through the front gate at the bottom of the driveway.

  Aidan didn’t bother with the doorbell anyway, he pushed both doors open wide. The hinges creaked as the heavy doors swung open.

  The inside of the house felt old and just stank of money.

  Stepping into the hallway, the ceiling was so high that our footsteps and voices echoed, a grand staircase made of black marble and dark wood, spiraled a half turn up to the next floor. This wasn’t something that I’d seen in a magazine - this was more like a something from a movie.

  There was old fashioned wainscoting, more paintings than I could count on the walls and, I swear to God, a real life suit of armor - I almost burst out laughing when I saw it!

  Aidan gave me a startled look, shrugging slightly at my giggles.

  “Yeah, well, it’s an old house,” he said, although I don’t think he understood how odd it was to have a literal suit of armor in a hallway!

  In the distance came the echoing sound of footsteps, the sound reverberating around the large room. Jack and I both looked around, trying to see where the person was approaching from. There, coming towards us from a corridor to the side of the staircase, was an older man in a neatly pressed suit.